Swanson Pyramid of Greatness
Ron Swanson devoloped the Pyramid of Greatness over the course of many years. It's a perfectly calibrated recipe for maximum personal achievement.
(Categories listed top to bottom by level of importance)
Category 1
- HARD WORK
Category 2
- America: The only country that matters. If you want to experience other "cultures," use an atlas, or a ham radio.
- Conservative: Be on the 'right side' of issues.
Category 3
- FAMILY
- CULTURE
- PASSION
Category 4
- Teamwork: Work together as if your life depends on it... IT DOES.
- Education: Always keep learning, someone will always be smarter than you.
- Intelligence: You're smarter than most people, remeber that.
- Greatness Itself: Whatever you choose to do, do it better than everyone else!
Category 5
- Discipline: The ability to repeat a boring thing over and over again.
- Women: Keep it classy, no one wants it easy.
- Confidence: Always know what your doing, even when you don't!
- My Wife: Incomparable.
- Cheese: Put that S**t on everything!
Category 6
- Steak-Delicious
- Chicken-Delicious
- Bacon-Delicious
- Turkey-Delicious
- Eggs-Delicious
- Fish (WTF?)
Category 7
- Intensity: Give 100%. 110% is impossible. Only idiots recommend that.
- Perspective: The grass is greener on the other side because it's fertilized with shenanigans.
- Parenting: Don't make the same mistakes your parents did.
- Religion: Prove It!
- Vallenato: The Colombian definition of Awesome.
- Pearl Jam: Enough Said.
- Cursing: There is only one bad word. Taxes. If any other word is good enough for sailors it's good enough for you.
Category 8
- Friends: One to Three is sufficient.
- Parents: Respect Them! Even when you hate them.
- Strength: Building your empire makes you strong. Defending them makes you even stronger.
- : Skinny Jeans Acceptable on skinny women only!
- Dress Code: Shine shoes, tuck shirt, match belt.
- You: You are your biggest ally.
- Crying: Acceptable at funerals and from laughter.
- Physical Fitness: Stay Healthy, you'll thank yourself later
Category 9
- Crossfit: Made for boys that can't lift like a man.
- Capitalism: God's way of determining who is smart, and who is poor.
- Legacy: Make people hate you because they can't be you.
- Soccer: The Sport of the World.
- Rage: One rage every three months is permitted. Try not to hurt anyone who doesn't deserve it.
- Patriotism: You're in America now, Act like it.
- Poise: Sting like a bee. Do not float like a butterfly, that's ridiculous and girly
- Handshakes: Firm, dry, solid. 3 seconds.
- MMA and Boxing: Either or, the real test of man.